When I was first diagnosed with Fibromyalgia back in 2005-ish, I was placed on a very typical treatment plan. An opioid for pain, anti-depressants, along with regular doctor and acupuncture appointments. At first it seemed like it was the answer I had been looking for but it wasn’t long before I realized that this treatment made me into a different person, I just wasn’t me. I could feel myself beginning to “need” the pain pills to cope with everyday life and found that I was working my activities around my opioid use. This didn’t work well as a mom of 3 young girls while also trying to work enough hours to make ends meet.
I woke up one morning and decided that I was not going to let myself be that person, that mom… I stopped it all, cold turkey. I decided that I was going to try to put my mind over matter and utilize the power of positive thinking to take control of my illness.
Keep in mind that everyone suffers from Fibro at varying degrees. My successes and failures are my own and can never be a gauge for another persons illness… With that said, I am stubborn, I want to control my own self and illness and for the most part, I have.
For years since then, I was very successful. I had some ups and downs with the illness but many more ups however over time, the downs came more frequently and more fierce. I did find myself drinking more and to be honest, I’m not sure if it was a habit so much as it really did seem to help the pain so I feel pretty comfortable in saying that I believe I was self medicating in part with alcohol.
Last year I spoke with my doctor about managing it better with medication as I hadn’t slept in months and suffered from chronic migraines. I began taking Cymbalta and after about 6 weeks, we increased the dose to see if it would work better. The side effects were as bad as the Fibro symptoms I suffered from and that is when I began this blog.
I received a medical marijuana card and used it to wean off of Cymbalta as I felt it was ruining my life. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done as the withdrawals were very severe. I learned how to infuse honey and coconut oil and for the most part I either drink honey in tea or use the oil to make capsules and topical salve. I use it on my terms and that is important to me. I don’t want to be drugged up and dependent on meds that have bad side effects and in some cases, horrible withdrawals.
For me, choosing cannabis means that I can decide when I feel it will help me. I’m in control, not my medication.
Don’t get me wrong, I still have the aches and pains, the headaches, the memory and brain fog, the nights of insomnia, etc… but what I have noticed since I started taking cannabis is that I drink alcohol a TON less than I did before, I feel like I’m in control of my illness and in general I feel like I have my life back.
I know it’s not the answer for everyone but it’s right for me. I’m so glad I gave it a try.
I took control and took my life back from Fibromyalgia. I may have this illness but I believe that it still doesn’t have me!
I wish you life, wellness, and happiness for 2017!